Well it’s been a while hasn’t it? You could almost suggest I’d been a bit lazy of late, and unfortunately the reporting of my critical work has been a little slack. I previously mentioned my struggles with seasonality- picking up the papers, looking at weird people, watching leaves fade to brown. Its forlorn, its melancholy, and it’s cold. Naturally as a scientist I felt this seasonal slide into misery more than most, shouldering the heavy blame of disappointment apportioned by rain, cold and heating bills. My research suffered. I was still getting the usual amount of free biscuits: homemade, (despite the lemon-biscuit fiasco), foreign, novelty, hotel, touristy, regional. I was in fact flooded with generousity. Accordingly there were inferences aplenty of picking the pen back up. The problem? I just couldn’t be arsed, I’d lost interest.
The days began to drag and a little of the colour of life seemed to have been lost forever. However, in the depth’s of my lethargy someone else bought me another pack of biscuits. There were claims of greatness, and as always of late, my academic scepticism kicked in. That was until I tasted one. I was interested again, I wanted another, I definitely didn’t want to share. A normal meal structure was about to be substituted for perpetual snacking. Drum roll please….
Now I’ve been glowingly effusive in my praise in the past. I suggested the clocks stopped when I first discovered Crunchie Biscuits. I compared Bourbons with visions of heaven, (and lets face it they are) and I ruined the sales of Mikado in one fell acidic swoop. I understand your cynicism. And now I’m going to explain the simple concept behind Leibniz that makes them better than all that have come before:
The chocolate slab is at least 25% larger than the biscuit base.
The chocolate is unnecessarily good.
And that’s it. Go out, buy some, revel in their delights. You’re welcome.
N.B. If you had to compare their delights I would suggest it’s akin to:
– Finding £100 in cash on the floor
– Going for a stroll in the country, after a large breakfast, on a clear winter day. And finding £100 in cash on the floor.
– Having an intimate one on one with Jesus, allowing him to explain all that is necessary for an ethical life, without incurring the need for organised religion. And then finding £100 in cash on the floor.